Priorities, it's like an obsession...

Did anyone catch the press conference of the secretaries of everything on CNN? I thought it was kind of weird that so many people who need food, shelter, sanitation, water, and evacuation and the first thing that they talk about is loosening the restrictions on gas refining so that gas prices will stabilize(at their current prices i wouldn't call it stability). I understand the need for gasoline for emergency vehicles and such but why now? The spokesman for the weather service predicted EXACTLY what was going to happen with Hurricane Katrina when it was off the coast of Florida. CNN would have little blurbs about The President's thoughts on opening up the Strategic Oil Reserves: The President is considering, he's mulling, The President is expected to.... I understand that the oil reserves are an important asset that should be used sparingly. But what were they expecting to happen? Optimism is grand and i know that no one can predict the future, but what about past lessons? And all the warnings prior? Oh well, it's a shame but at least now the people are starting to get the help they need.

Doodlings by the artist....

I hope you like this little doodle I did of Das Hammer's profile pic.

Lost in the woods, and then an African Festival...

Today my stepfather and i went out to see a lot that interested him and my mother. It was out in the boonies. There was a class 6 road that led to the lot. It was 15.26 acres in area, with 11 of those acres being what i would call "wild". It wasn't a bad drive, and the day was kind of cool. We parked the car in a "driveway" and set off on foot to see the lot. We got to it and an old man was walking into a shed that was on the property and he was muttering to himself. We approached him and asked questions about the lot. He got kinda angry and told us the guy across the way was selling it. So we walked over and had a chat with Ted. He was a nice guy, a retired airline pilot with a huge RV and he was getting ready to go off on an adventure. He walked us back to the lot and told us the general boundaries of it.

It is a meadow on one end and a marsh on the other and wild woods in between. The meadow was really nice and it smelled really good. Like Nag Champa but woodier. Ted said that there was a pretty island on the other end where the marsh is located but you'd need a boat to go to it since the marsh water is neck deep. We scoffed and dared him to challenge us again. We told Ted that we'd like to take a walk around and see the property.
"Okay but you should take a compass," Ted said.
"I'm used to walking in the wild," My stepfather's exact words were. And so we set off. Down the gentle slope of the meadow to the edge of the treeline.

We entered into the woods and just barged right into the depths of it. It reminded me of some scene from the Dark Crystal, or Krull. The further we went in the darker it got. We trudged on and on. Going in deeper and deeper. We got to a stone wall and past it we could see slick muddy marshy lands. My stepfather has a habit of thinking idealistically about living in nature and understanding the land and so on so forth. He decided to follow the stone wall. Through ferns and branches and spiderwebs and rocky outcroppings. We ventured on like old trappers from times best forgotten.

"Let's go back...", My stepfather says after losing his bearings. "Which way should we go?" He asks. "That way," I stated, because i have a good sense of direction and i had kept my bearing.
"Okay then, lead the way." The landscape got wierder and wierder. "I don't remember this..." He said, the slight flutter of panic quavering in his voice. "Don't worry, it's this way" confidence. After about twenty feet: "No it's this way, there's a clearing over there," he changes course. I let him lead and follow him. "Oh i guess it isn't this way, got any ideas?" he asks. "Yeah let's head back thisaway," I point back to my original heading. "Okay then lead the way," thank you... About another thirty or forty feet: "There's a clearing over there! It's lighter there!" He starts bounding through the brush like a virgin deer. "Oh... I think we're lost.." no you are. "No it's this way,"; "Okay then, lead the way." And so i did. This was repeated another five times.

I started snickering. Trying to hold in my laughter about my stepfather's love for clearings and his constant need to turn to the left. I felt like dashing off, but that would have been really mean. He looked at me with irritation. "We're loooooost.." He tried to straighten me out. "No we're not it's this way," i repeated. We got to another clearing and i could sense the panic starting to rise. I started to question myself too. Was I lost? Was I going to have to bludgeon my stepfather and live off his meats? Was I going to have to become a wildman again? No. We trundled on the heading I suggested. The trees were starting to clear and my stepfather made a turn to the left. He quickly crashed through the plants and came out the other side in the meadow we had started in, except on the neighbours property. I walked out laughing wildly like a deranged squirrel. "If you followed me we would have come out where we came in!" I teased him. "I thought we were lost!" he said sourly. "HAHAHA!" i laughed. it was fun. I guess the lesson is: If you ever get lost don't panic, and don't get infatuated with clearings.

After that I took him and my mom out to Longhorns for some yummy steaks.
And after that we went and watched performers from Africa dance and play instruments. It was good.

Which idiot gave them guns?!?! (A story in pictures)

I would like to know your interpretation of the story.!

Antiduckites...

I think that people who use the phrase "if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then it's a duck" aren't using enough parameters in deciding whether or not something is actually a duck...

So I have decided to expand on the offending phrase:
If it walks like a duck,
quacks like a duck,
acts like a duck,
swims like a duck,
eats like a duck,
is attracted to the same things as a duck,
enjoys doing the same things a duck does in it's leisure time,
is turned on by ducks of the opposite sex,
or is turned on by ducks of the same sex 1/10th of the time,
eats duck food,
likes to hang out in duck social circles,
has duck friends,
has not labelled itself "chicken",
belongs to a duck political party and has voted duck in the past two elections,
is scared of peking duck,
lost it's virginity to a duck at 16 after being dared to at a cast party,
does not wear a neck tie,
then most likely the probability of the thing being a duck is high enough to start calling said object "duck".

A conversation with my buddy Mike...

My buddy Mike and I were conversing.. The conversation got onto the topic of the legalizing marijuana issue in Canada and where it's going. Alot of people seem to think that marijuana causes psychoses Mike tells me. I told him that my opinion was that there had to be a problem there in the first place and the drug just makes people feel something different and lose their inhibitions. I also told him that owning a gun causes one to go psycho, so does sharpening a knife, owning a ski mask, and the desire to strangle things.

Why is it that the psychos ruin it for everyone? Osama bin Laden, Adolf Hitler, Walt Disney and Michael Jackson.. It's getting so that i can't even have children sleep in my bed anymore!

If you get the chance...

I can't stand people who type stupid chat type. lyk ur hanz kant faking wrk. AnD d STop1d youse O#f $ymblz 4 L3t3r$. @$$3$ + @$$}-{0|_3z. Why do i keep hating the players and not the game? Bloggin, much like pimpin, ain't easy. Jedishadow isn't written in stoopid type by the way. Check out Jedishadow blog. Not the most impressive Jedi but apparently a self-professed one. These aren't the blogs you're looking for, move along. Make sure you check out Master Yoda's blog. It's the funniest thing i've seen around.

Quote

Today's quote... not that this'll be a daily thing but it's just today's quote:
"Life is a marathon and not a sprint." -pretty much everyone that's been interviewed in the past six months
Life is a marathon and not a sprint, except for you hard and fast living babies. Live free or die, that's what i say.

The price of food...

So there i was loading my goods onto the conveyor belt. milk, juice, eggs, meat, bread, cheese, cereal, tomatoes, potatos, a sack of salad... I had a hard time putting the basket away cause the one undereath it had the handles up and it was covered in some sticky substance, probably some kid eating sticky candy and then manhandling the handle... I left the pile of baskets and scooched in front of the cashier. I looked at the screen "Forty dollars!" "holy shitballs" i muttered to myself. I pulled out two twentys from my old worn brown leather wallet and gave it to the cashier one at a time to make sure that i didn't give out more than i needed too. The sticky material that had transferred onto my hand made it hard to rub the bills though, so it seemed like i just didn't want to let go or that i was trying to read and understand "20". The line behind me shuffled in the first prickles of impatience. I smiled a big hearty smile at the cashier and put the money in her outstretched hands with a proud look. As she turned to the register i looked down at her name tag. Kyandrey. What the hell kinda name is Kyandrey... She turned around with my receipt. I quickly snapped my eyes up to hers and looked like a dear caught in headlights. Her face began the first steps of a sour grimace but then she remembered that i was the customer. "You have two ys in your name," I tried appeasement with charm. She looked at me slightly disgusted. "They look like flux capacitors...". Puzzled disgust. "From back to the future..". "Are you retarded?" "....no....."

The joys of gatekeepers...

Have you noticed trends on blogs? where the same information or quotes seem to come up on different blogs? I'm sure it can all be explained in some fromula or behavioural terms. But it makes me feel nice. Like Noam Chomsky burning books nice.

From my perch on high...

Saturday! YEAY! all the jerks come out tonight!!! HUZZAH!!
And i've already espied a group of asses...
Please! Allow me the pleasure of conveying:
A group of boys who are apparently hard up( you can judge me cause you didn't see the girls), try impressing a couple of girls with their enthusiastic attentions. The girls (both platinum blondes[ i could tell cause their roots were dark] with perms or the 21st century equivalent, you know what i mean, that slightly curly wet dirty looking hair.. but i digress: they were both dressed in black sleeveless tshirts with glittery one word mottos on the front stating their willingness or their ability. They both had on the 21st century equivalent of stone washed jeans.) weren't too impressed. The boys(dressed like your average joe schmo who does his shopping in malls and wears what they wear on tv. baggy khaki shorts with polo type shirts in clashing colors with those little socks that only come up under the ankle with white tennis shoes, and that describes the group.) took offense to the aloofity of the girls... aloofity, thank you. So one of the more hard up boys sends a badly toned, badly expressed remark to the girls. This , of course being an unacceptably high amount of public dissing, sent the girls into high pitched retorts of "you ain't even hot an you be fron'in stupi!". And now for the icing on the cake, with some context of course: I don't think that i have an exceptional aptitude over others of being able to tell some people's ethnic background. But if you ask my friends they'll say that i do. So anyways, the group of boys were (i'd say) of an Italian descent, they didn't speak with a discernable accent, at least not one i noticed. And the icing you ask? here it is: The girls (i think it was the first salient thing that bubbled up in their collective "disback" vernacular) yelled over their shoulders: "Go back to your own country!"
And this sent me into a wild gaggle fit! I jumped out of my chair and hooted and hollered(to my indignation[i can admit it now]) and laughed as heartily as i could out my window(this speaks wonders for my social stature: laughing out a window at people socializing on a saturday night). I pictured myself as some deranged gargoyle meting out social justice with "i know what you said was something that could only have escaped an idiot!" barbs of laughter. I laughed heartily. And they just scattered, the beauty and joy of the moment having passed them by like a disturbing scent on a breeze.

p.s if you read the hot summer nights in manchester post down below you'll get a better understanding about why i'm like this..................

If i were a survivalist....

If i were a survivalist i would own a plot of land out in the middle of the midwest. or maybe even somewhere tucked away in the south. It would probably be a ranch of some sort that i could ride my horsey around on and camp out on. I'd have a small garden to plant taters, maters, beans, greens, tobaccy and of course marihwuana... My domicile would be a log cabin. one story spread out. i'd have a couple of bedrooms and bathrooms and a big airy kitchen. a living room with a tv(for video games, no cable or satellite cause the media is meant to brainwash). I'd have a big study with a fire place and lots and lots of shelves for my old books(the kind of books that the government and book corporations haven't had a chance to edit). I'd have my one story ranch set up like a sheik's palace in alhambra or granada. with thick old persian carpets and cushions and hanging tapestries and incense burners and hookahs galore. The only chairs i'd own would be a rocking chair on the porch to shoot varmints and chairs to go with my viking dining table. It would be long enough to host feasts of historical grandeur. I'd have a basement stocked with guns. Old ancient antiques from spanish arqabuses to berber jazairs to flintlocks and matchlocks and what not locks. pistols and rifles and muskets galore. I'd also have a section dedicated to newer arms of incredible technological ingenuity. like the browning .45 the k98, ak47, m1 garand, hkg33, ar15 and various other works. I'd go out on my horsey and camp out and eat my veggies and varmints and shoot old tin cans... ah the life of a stylish survivalist with expensive tastes. she's the one for moi.

It's funny...

people always want to know why you don't believe in God. they never want to know why someone else believes in god. it's like some kind of private joke. Jains view life as sacred. Christians view life as sacred. Jews, Muslims too. but so many deaths caused by people kiling in the name of God. Christians in Ireland, Jews in Palestine, Muslims in Israel. Thou shalt not kill. some people argue that what God meant to say was that thou shalt not commit murder. but that killing in war or to defend ideals/country/etc. is fine. every bible i've read said Thou shalt not kill. maybe thou was a popular name back then. Not to poke fun, i just find it funny. i question when i am struck with awe and wonderment. sunrise, blue skies, lightning, stars, waterfalls, fish, grains in wood. but then i see the death and dying, murder, killing, sadness, exploitation, gold, greed. has God done more good than bad? to say that those are Satan's/evil working is to say that God can't or won't change it. so has god done more good than bad? well then it wouldn't make any sense to live in a world without evil, or darkness, because without those good and light couldn't exist. so then God has logic? and reasoning? and must exist in a state of balance? therefore he is not omnipotent. Something outside of God causes him to live by it's rules? Have a little faith and believe... in which God? by believing I validate the opposite in that spectrum. In believing i validate the believers of Satan as part of that sytem/value set. Am i arrogant enough to believe that my faith validates one God over another God? just the different sects alone: Baptist, Shia, Unitarian, Protestant, Catholic, Ismaili, Jesuit, Sunni, Hassidem, and so on ad infinitum. someone once told me that i won't see my grandmother in heaven cause she wasn't a certain sect of a certain religion. So be it. I'll be the last man out of Hell.

My take on the subject...

From what i've glossed over in the past while:
The Illuminati are plotting to cause a major dying out of humans (approximately 99.5% of the population). They are doing this so that the offspring of the 13 bloodlines can live in grand immortality. How you say? With nanotechnology of course! How else? Imagine a whole world to yourself. Young, free, and immortal... Doing whatever and whomever you like. Rest assured, when it does happen i'm going take as many of you bastards out with me... whilst partying like it's 1999. And by you bastards I mean the common folk; and not the chosen few of the enlightened brotherhood... and sisterhood too i guess. But i don't think that that does really matter if you are immortal... even though i don't swing that way... Not that there's anything wrong with it, or that i wouldn't want to. Cause i'm pretty stylish and have a great fashion sense.... But i like my milk from the cow's udder, if you catch my drift...

Notice that flag button?

I'VE BEEN FLAGGING EVERYONE!

I'm a poet and i didn't even realize that...

A dark horizon rages,
old books with sweet smelling spines,

meetings with poets in sagesse,
bottle of red aged chianti.

Light horizon burning,
pages kept folded,
i long for you with a deep want,
bleu cheese blue.

High noon full moon,
soft rough cut pulp,
i'll join you shortly,
this last tumbler i'll swallow.

-
A dark horizon rages,
old books with scented pages,
meetings with poets and sages,
an old bottle of ages.

Light horizon burning,
pages kept turning,
I long with deep yearning,
taste bleu burning.

High noon full moon,
soft cut pulped wood,
to you i'll be soon,
my last drink drunk good.

-
A dark horizon rages,
old books with rotted spines,
meetings of poets and sages,
a bottle of rancid wine.

Light horizon burning,
pages kept folded,
i long for deep yearning,
rotted cheese molded.

High noon full moon,
soft rough cut pulp,
I'll join you soon,
this glass i gulp.


i just didn't feel like rhyming at first but then i wanted to see rhymes, and then different rhymes.

It's absolutely frikin' amazing...

It slaps me idiotic that so many people write about stuff they don't know or understand. So many people generalize and write such dumb things that it really amazes me. Is empathy and compassion and understanding dead? Does no one investigate anything anymore? And by investigate i mean the most basic looking up of something. Apparently everyone knows everything and the simple act of publishing it online makes it the truth. But alas, i am getting myself worked up about nothing. It is only blogging after all. It's a shame how the mainstream media have given credibility to these things. Anyone can publish anything (stupid anecdotes, hilarious jokes, number tricks, useless questions about super powers).
The flip side to this is that people can express their opinions. Which is very good. But opinions are not the truth. But i have to find out the definition of truth first.
I guess it's true what they say about opinions. What i'm trying to say that it's a shame that everyone knows everything and that they are so eager to post the truth, where it's just a sad pathetic opinion masquerading as a half-truth. So eager to post the truth where they don't even understand what's going on. Just vomiting up tidbits they heard somewhere sometime. And in the process digesting it a little bit to suck out whatever useful piece of info they can get out of it to suit their need. The curse of the bell shaped curve. So much garbage and junk until you start getting into the 70% range. I guess i should just be thankful to the choice few out there who do good.

Super choices...

A question has plagued me for ages. I've always wondered what other people thought about it. And here she is:
If you could choose one of the following super powers which one would it be?
1. Invisibility
2. The ability to pass through objects (walls, floors, frilly clothing...)
3. The ability to fly (without flapping your arms)
4. The ability to stop or slow down time
5. The ability to read people's minds
6. The ability to control people's minds
7. The ability to think up any object you wanted (one hundred billion dollars...)

I would personally go for the flying ability. I think i would enjoy that one the most. Although the others are quite enticing. I'd love to be able to sneak up on people and scare the living wind out of them and play horrid pranks whilst remaining unperceived. I'd also love to be able to conjure up whatever i wanted just by thinking it (sandwich). The slowing down of time would be fun too. Having my enemies suddenly denuded in public tickles my spine, let alone my enemies girlfriends.... Muuuaaaahhh!! But I think i'd enjoy flying the most. I could go anywhere i wanted! Iraq, Afghanistan, North Korea, Lubbock Texas! No place would be safe!!! Of course i think i'd only choose this power if it were on the condition that i didn't have to flap my arms... I think i'll add that condition now. Good good.